The Elevation Band led worship with a couple of songs, Holy Moment and God of Wonders.
The Scripture reading for the night from Matthew 15:21-28.
"I saw a woman on the beach in Hawaii three years after my son told me that he loved my little face. I was forty three, and in the early stages of seeing that I had, in fact, become a woman of beauty: I hadn't fully grown into this yet, but the truth was pressing through more and more of the confusion and judgment that had blinded me most of my life.
The woman on the beach, who was about my age, was playing in the surf with her young child. She was near the shore, in water that barely reached her knees, so I could see her clearly. There was nothing physically dramatic about her. Nearby in the water or tanning themselves on beach towels were younger women and teenagers in bikinis- who were brown, lithe, smooth, and perfect. But this woman looked like me and my friends. She was of average height, with long, dark hair, a bit heavy, with the thigh challenge and a poochy stomach.
And she was wearing a bikini, like all the younger women, whereas I, like the other women over thirty, was wearing a one-piece spandex suit, designed for maximum disguise. But here she was, splashing around in a black string bikini, with an extraordinary lack of self-consciousness and a glistening confidence. You couldn't take your eyes off her. She commanded the beach.
We sneaked looks at her, as if she were a movie star. She was the Greek goddess of surf. We beheld her. I thought, “That could be me someday. I could wear a bikini too, theoretically.”
I wondered whether I could splash about like her, with abandon, my head thrown back and my arms held out to the sun. And later that day, I did. Okay: I was wearing mascara, and the same old jaws-of- death swimsuit I’d been wearing that morning. And when I dropped my towel in the sand, I felt shy and stricken and jiggly. After a minute I straightened my shoulders, reached for my son’s hand, and ran with him into the ocean, and I splashed and sploshed and ducked under the waves, and then leapt back up to the air, like Our Lady of the Tides, for all the world to see."
Rev. Nathan Meckley presented the Skidoosh:
Our Lenten reflection series on shame concluded Sunday night. Nathan began with a short review of the definition of shame and the “shame resilience model” outlined by Dr. Brené Brown in her book, I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Wasn't), and he briefly highlighted some of the themes covered in the previous weeks.
He then turned to the scripture story of the Canaanite woman who came to Jesus for the healing of her daughter. In the story, Jesus refers to her and her daughter as “dogs.” While it was a common expression Jews used to describe Gentiles, it was an obvious slur and an epithet that remains shocking to hear on the lips of Jesus. The unnamed woman turns out to be the shame-resilient hero of the story. In an honor-shame society, she first reaches out as a Gentile woman to a Jewish rabbi, and furthermore, she doesn't withdraw or retreat after the insult of being called a “dog.” She continues to reach out for connection and healing. Her daughter is healed and we see Jesus commend her faith -- and his ministry opens even further to include Gentiles.
Following this scriptural “shame resilience” story, Nathan returned to our working definition of shame (as provided by Brene Brown): “shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are somehow flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging.” It is a very accurate description of our shame experience AND it reveals what Nathan called “the toxic twist” at the heart of shame. The words “and therefore” create an equation between A (the painful experience of being flawed or making mistakes) and B (feeling/believing one is unworthy of acceptance and belonging). Being flawed and making mistakes will be a universal, lifelong human experience. Those flaws and mistakes may also have very painful consequences, however, they need not lead us to a belief in unworthiness or lack of connection for ourselves or for others.
If the shame equation is A=B, the shame resilience equation is A ≠ B.
We still have flaws and make mistakes, but we remain worthy of love, belonging and connection.
When we notice our feelings or thoughts flowing to the “shame” conclusion, we can notice and interrupt them. We did a thought exercise to practice interrupting this shame equation for an area in our lives about which we may feel shame, and then in a case where we may view disconnecting from or shaming someone else.
While shame may lead to a conclusion that we or others are unworthy of love, acceptance and belonging, the message of the gospel is completely different: see the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) and Romans 8:38-39: “Nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.”
After the Skidoosh we broke into three Activities from which people could choose to participate:
1. Continued discussion with Nathan
2. Wired for Connection with Eli
3. Shame Interrupted Meditation with John
From there, we went into our Spiritual Practice of group prayer, led by Eli Zigdon.
We then had a time of Giving and Receiving lead in worship by the band to "Captivate Us".
Finally after hearing announcements for the week, we Closed the service by singing "You Are A Child of Mine".
As usual, after service all were invited to participate in our weekly Pizza Ritual and filled Easter Eggs for an upcoming Easter Egg hunt.
